Throwback to a Saturday night in Newark, brick-layered and heavy. Menacing, a remnant of Essex County. Were you ever afraid of the dark like me? I’ve never told anyone but you about the map of the U.S. painted on my Catholic school blacktop playground. I busted my lip four times playing freeze tag. I loved the days I was home from school. My mother would buy me balloons until I got better. And at night she would leave again for work and I would be scared of what was behind the closet. I would hum facedown in my bed until I slept. We cut off a piece of that mattress when we moved away. I’m scared to open the hallway closet to look at it. You told me you didn’t know what you feared the most. I hope if we are trapped in a room you’ll smile wide, think of our text messages, and remember to be honest–sober this time.