I once worked
As an one armed bartender,
In a downtown whiskey bar.
The crowd was rough,
The music loud,
Fights happened quite a lot…
While drunk, I fell down
And tore my rotator cuff,
Lost most of the use
Of my arm.
Couldn’t work for a while
At my regular job,
Thought the bar job
Would just be a lark.
Tax free money,
Rock & Roll,
And all the tips
I could make…
I didn’t figure on hecklers,
Who sat barstools
And pestered all night.
I also found out how hard
It can be, with one arm,
To try and break up a fight…
I learned fast also
That tips aren’t so good
Without the advantage of tits.
I was happy whenever my arm healed,
To go back to my job from before,
And I was glad to be
On the right side of the bar,
I’ll never tend bar no more.
